Monday, August 27, 2012

Single-mommydom

The newest decoration in my apartment.
Single-mommydom: The place in which all single mothers live. The one where you sacrifice all for your child. Where you cook and clean and bathe and play and read and tuck in 24/7. Where at the end of everyday your hair is always a mess and your clothes are stained and you smell slightly off. But despite all the adversity, you get to experience all the love and adventure that makes it all more than worth while :)
Today is James David's 2nd birthday! However, you would not have known it by the way today went. It did not start with a delicious chocolate chip pancake breakfast, but to a mom rushing out the door because she's running late, and trying to force her tiny man to drink his pediasure. There was no day to spend together. No hoorah at the zoo, or anything else spectacular in little boy world. Instead, little man went to school where he got to be the line leader all day! :) Mommy went to school, and then to work. I battled insane traffic and picked up a very tired little man (apparently little boys don't nap on their birthday). He slept on the way home. Then we opened up all his birthday toys! My living room has been transformed. We set up tents, and railroad tracks, and barns. My apartment has been turned into little boy world. After not eating dinner, (if you've been keeping track that comes to a big ole total of NOTHING that he's eaten today) we settled down to go "Night Night". I had it in my mind that I would tuck him in, and tell him all about how he came into the world. A special journey for a special little boy. How perfect God created him. However, after an hour of hysteria, and vomiting three times, I found myself curled up in a firetruck bed with my little man, his sleepy little face finally resting. Its moments like those that are my saving grace.
I realized in that moment, staring down at my son as I have so many nights since he was born, and felt nothing but unconditional love. I knew that although my day wasn't perfect, or as adventurous and fairytale as I would have wanted it to be, it was MINE. I know that one day James David will be proud of him mommy for following her dreams. One day I will give him something that will top all the chocolate chip pancakes and zoo trips he could imagine. So Happy Birthday James David. Mommy loves you more than you know.